snail tale

Hi there, for a little bit of context, my site is already published, I don't have a domain to my name, and this is my first blog post, i have posted on Instagram, YouTube,

twitter now X as if it no longer belongs in my life, it's an X mark, an into mark as my mum used to say while teaching me the dreadful mathematics which also had a lot of asterisks, speaking of have you heard of Asterix and obelix, you have to watch it, I'm not going to give anything away not even the A of Asterix, I watched with my polish roommates, one of which bought the recently released comic book, I on the other hand bought, not a comic book, they're too overwhelming for me, i think there's too much going on, i have to squint my eyes and bring the book 3 inches away from my eyes, looking like i don't know what.

definitely not as cute

coming back to what i was actually going to say, I ADOPTED A SNAILLLLL that can't sail, it bleedy drowns in even a mm of liquid

a few things to note:

• it's inside a jar with a hole to hold on to its snail life

• i keep it outside on the windowsill

• condensation inside jar gives it water, which is snail life

• and it receives food once in a day,

• thanks, me by pooping decor all over the jar

now, my first impressions

the jar stinks,

it stinks,

it makes snail juice inside

and that stinks too

that's all for today folks,

disclaimer: no AI was used in the writing of this blog post, nor were any snails harmed in the process

Keywords: first blog post, personal blog, stream of consciousness, humorous storytelling, pet snail, snail jar, stinky snail jar, snail care, windowsill pet, odd pet stories, everyday absurdity, quirky narration, messy domestic life, roommate life, Asterix and Obelix, social media era, Instagram blogger, no AI writing, authentic writing, dark humor, self‑deprecating humor